I have too damn many unwatched movies. While organizing some DVDs recently, I realized I had a cheapo Brentwood 10-movie set that I think I initially bought for David Heavener’s TWISTED JUSTICE. That right there should tell you there is something wrong with me. Anyway, I decided I should actually watch some of the other films in the set (mistake #1). Then I decided I would send a list of the 6 films from the set that I hadn’t seen to my friends and let them decide my fate (mistake #2). Being refined cinephiles, they all gravitated toward MIND, BODY & SOUL thanks to the casting of Wings Hauser and Ginger Lynn Allen. Okay, I’ll do it *pops in DVD…credits start…directed by Rick Sloane* awwwww, hell.
The action abruptly starts with a shot of Brenda (Ginger Lynn Allen) and her boyfriend Carl (Jesse Hill) standing on a California hillside and staring at the camera. Apparently it is their 3 month anniversary and Carl has something special planned. He takes her to a ritual held by the satanic cult he belongs to. Ah, what a romantic. Led by a masked man with a distorted voice (more on that in a bit), they stand around and chant “do-do-do-do” as the leader prepares to sacrifice a girl. Thankfully, the cops show up before the bloodletting can begin and the cult disciples plow out of the door in impressive fashion. The only person left standing is Brenda, so the cops promptly arrest her. She is grilled by Detective McKenzie (Jay Richardson) about her involvement, but says she is innocent and will lead them to her boyfriend. Of course, when they get there his apartment explodes in a blaze of stock footage.
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Just another Friday night in L.A. |
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Viewers react to a Sloane movie |
So Sloane couldn’t even tell his lead, “Hey, ease up on your easily identifiable acting style.” If there was a single person who was fooled by this twist and had their jaw hit the floor during the revelation, I want to meet that person and tell them I’m Jesus. Seriously, Sloane, you couldn’t be bothered? Words and ideas are free – give them a chance to do something creative.
Of course, this kind of movie doesn’t really exist to challenge the audience. It is there to provide cheap thrills (with an emphasis on the cheap as nearly every stunt in this movie is from stock footage). Most of the thrills will come from viewers hoping to see lead Ginger Lynn Allen nude. If only there was some other film genre that allowed audiences the chance to see her go all the way. Yes, the main attraction here is to see the former porn queen get topless. Weird, right? I must admit, it is kind of funny seeing her act like an old maid when her boyfriend asks her to drip wax on him. Allen was trying to make the transition from X-rated films to legit film, but this unfortunately found her in the land of Sloane. It is a shame as she is a decent actress and should have fared better than her decade long sojourn into mainstream cinema allowed (she also got saddled with Sloane in three VICE ACADEMY features). Backing her up are Richardson and Hauser in their supporting roles. I’ll be honest I think Wings could read the McDonald’s menu and make it sound compelling, so it is always a bummer when he ends up in subpar stuff like this. Anyway, I can now scratch MIND, BODY & SOUL off my list of unwatched flicks. Now only 1,000 more to go!
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